Lost Souls - Sticky Notes

Blood Shot Eyes

1am Sunday morning…

loads on the mind, but not today

lots to muse over, but not tonight

something precisely to address, but never again

ama let the mind drift, no more symphonies

let myself wonder, not even rhapsodies

and then I found this pic, throwback?

Naah… only a few months weeks days ago

Bloodshot eyes

As we stepped out of the meeting room

It lasted some 3 hours or under, that was a quick meeting, a good day!

A little chitchat by the elevator then he turned to leave

“Damn! You need some sleep! Your eyes are red”, I said

“Is it obvious? I’ve really not been sleeping too well”

“well, take it easy man, easy on yourself”

“thanks! I really have to try”… as he took the stairs

Elevator door opens, I step in…

starring right back at me in the mirror was my own face

whoops! I stepped closer, my eyes are red too

Pretty worse than his, actually bloodshot

the reasons are obvious I thought

Hey, it’s not all gloomy, but let’s rant…

The illusions of the wall street life or is it the broad street lie?

Where you supposed to be earning more money than you can spend

Where your best reward is a little more work for the great one you done did

…of course, the best guy’s got to ensure nothing gets frenched up!

Where you either crack it or schmooze it, cos really they’re both quite effective

Where you gat to collaborate competitively or compete collaboratively

…whatever paradox works the best for you

Where you spend your life, to earn your life, funny!

Where you’re taught a lot about health, safety and security

PhD in Theoretical Health cos we ensure you skip your lab sessions

Did I say more money than you can use? Well am still waiting

But too busy and stressed to spend it? Hell yea! I can relate!

Best guy? Don’t ever fall into that trap. I repeat, don’t!

Backbenching isn’t always bad, or at best find a midtempo and coast

…and oh! Before I forget, that’s called balance

And in case you’re already trapped, hit me up

I got the keys to some back door, you’d be long gone, they’d think you’re still here

Schmoozing? Let’s not get started on this one…

…but yea, some folks are just too dumb to be good at anything else but the actual work!

and just in case you’re confused, schmoozing is a virtue

…in proper English, it’s called effective stakeholder management

There are many paradoxes within those walls, but that’s one of my favorite

Can’t be so hard to score as many pupils a hundred if they earned it, can it?

Or maybe it can, so it’s either a 100 meter sprint or an Orchestra, let’s pick a struggle

Last I checked, we all disciples, problem’s we miss the for me in…

“but whoever loses their life for me will find it”

cos losing your life for these streets means losing it for real, you ain’t finding nada!

These streets make you chase till and in your greys

But while there isn’t much you can do about ‘em greys – who says there isn’t?

There’s a whole lot you can do about the chase…

That? You can literally just cut!

It’s 3am in the morning. Oh! French! 3:30.

Sleep disorders have been the norm for a while, a known while

Well, I’ve been watching these AGT stars, and a tear or two, or maybe five have helped

And now sleep calls…

I’m sorry this doesn’t seem conclusive in any way, pfff

But did I promise to find fixes to your life’s problems? No!

I bet most of you don’t even think these are issues, trust me, that’s just fine

But just in case you felt a little uneasy, you need to find your answers

And when you do, or in case you already have ‘em, please share.

I recently found mine, I recently found mine… Please find yours!

May the lights guide you home.

Good morning.

My One-Night Encounter [2]

It was a Friday morning...
Woke up late & tired just wanted to sleep-in
But then, I got up grudgingly, got ready, hit the road.
And since I was already late, I took a detour

Some things are better left unsaid, yea, and then I had to run

On my way from Maitama Sule…

Took the right turn to Grillo and then I saw someone

Standing tall and gorgeous, like a beautiful glass of wine

It’s been ages, but the memories came right back

The last time I saw her, she was in tears

But today? No! she looked all luscious & boisterous

I had to stop, but I was late, but stop I did. I parked.

Hey hey… Is that you? I said as I walked towards her

She smiled, oh yes it is… I’m so sorry about the last time

I was too engrossed in my feelings, I was bad company

C’mon stop! I understood perfectly, you needed a shoulder

I wanted to be that, lol, but you vanished into thin air

Well, Sunmi, that’s a long time now… it’s been almost 2 years

Yea, a little under 2 years, but it feels like yesterday sometimes

Not all the time, but yea sometimes, it feels like yesterday still

I was good to him… I was good for him, or so I thought

But all that’s past now, it’s all in the past… her voice getting soft

Wow! Well… these things happen. People come, people go

I guess he’s gone for good, right?

Oh yea he is, even though we were in touch for long after

In an unhealthy way, but now it’s over he’s gone for good.

You kept in touch? Did you reach out to him?

Well, yes I did, it’s sad I know, but as shameful as it was, I did.

But I found he was still him, the user he was

And when I tried to withdraw he wouldn’t let go… sigh!

I still love him though, but now he belongs to another...

Oh yea? He’s married now? Oh yes he is… Wow!

Do you sometimes wish he was still yours?

Hell No! I love him yeah… but he a harlot!

He’s married, yes. He’s got a ring, yes.

But he still remains the harlot he was…

always seeking attention, always wanting girls

I wish I could be jealous of his wife, but no, what I feel is pity

It all makes sense to me now… she’s a good naive woman

He’s always on work trips away from home she believes

While he shamelessly chases everything in skirt on the streets

Hmmmm… you spoke mostly in parables the day we met

Was he cheating on you too? Didn’t he love you?

Love?!?!?! Hahahahaha… well yes, he loved me

As long as love was taking without giving, oh yes he did

As long as love was having your way all the goddamned time, of course he did

As long as love was picking and choosing when to stay, he had the most

It took me time to tell, it was all my fault.

Not everyone loved the way I knew. Not everyone believed in love, the way I did

I guess I was naive, I guess I was foolish

I thought love never dies, that it wouldn’t change, that it meant forever,

But I guess I was wrong, and as hard as it was, I tried to move on

And whenever I finally thought I was doing OK, guess what, he showed up again

“I miss you a lot sometimes”

Well, don’t blame yourself for how others define love

I weirdly believe it should last forever too, I still believe it’s meant to be true.

Did you say true? Oh then I get it!

Cos lying is his hobby. He a pathetic petty liar

If he told lies for a living, which he does, he should be a billionaire

Once I saw his wife looking chubby, guess what crossed my mind…

I thought her body must be nourished with loads of lies. Aha, petty, very petty, I know 😊

He’s always wanted the ring on his 4^th finger

He’s always wanted to have kids

He’s always wanted someone to drown in his sea of many sorrows

I guess he’s got that now… believe me, by his standards #menarescum

Have you really moved on? Have you stopped loving him?

Sadly, I can’t. I promised him forever, and I don’t know how to break my promises

Sh*t, that’s scary! Oh yea I know… but I don’t know how to stop loving him

I just stopped showing it. And I’m never going back

It makes no sense pouring yourself into someone who only uses you

It made no sense crying over him every day for 18 months

It made no sense offering love to someone who only wanted a trophy wife

It made no sense… a man who wants to love you only behind the scenes

It made no sense... And I’m never going back

Seun, enough of me… how about you? How have you been?

Erm… me? I'm a listener, not a talker - I thought to myself

Hmmmm, would you want to have lunch some time?

Is that the answer to my question? Wait! Are you asking me out?

Erm… yea... I’m asking if you’d like to eat some food later today

Well, I’d say yes if you asked me properly… like on one knee

Ahahahaha, I’ll do both knees if that’d work.

Ok then 4pm, anywhere close to Awolowo road.

Great! But now I have to be at work…

I drew her close, pecked her and gave her a good squeeze.

It’s been only 3 weeks now… and so far, it’s all bliss!